El Salvador families search for disappeared children decades after war

Through the airplane window, all I could see was blackness: no lights, no indication of security, just blackness. Just the unknown staring up at us we descended from the sky and into San Salvador.

I was nervous. Scratch that; I was terrified. Twenty-year-old me, the youngest person in our group, nicknamed ‘OC’ after my suburban southern California roots. My family could not understand why I was doing this; my grandparents begged me to reconsider.

But I knew I had to go the moment I first heard about a University of Washington Task Force that would be traveling to El Salvador to help reunite families who were violently divided by during the 1980s civil war.

Throughout the conflict, fighting between the Salvadoran army and guerrilla forces led to systematic attacks on the civilian population as the state tried to reassert control. (Photo by Linda Hess Miller via Wikimedia Commons)
Throughout the conflict, fighting between the Salvadoran army and guerrilla forces led to systematic attacks on the civilian population as the state tried to reassert control. (Photo by Linda Hess Miller via Wikimedia Commons)

I knew the facts, I knew atrocity had occurred, but that was from my cozy classroom. Now I was actually going to see El Salvador.

Between 1980 and 1992, El Salvador was immersed in violent civil war. The government and military, supported by the U.S., commonly used death squads, disappearances and torture. During the war, the U.S. provided more than $5 billion in aid and military assistance to the Salvadoran government.

Over 75,000 civilians died, while thousands more were tortured or ‘disappeared.’ 75,000 people. That’s like the entire population of Bellingham.

Thousands of children were forced apart from their families. Many were sent to the U.S. for adoption, where families were told they’d been orphaned. The baby trade was big business. International adoption lawyers charged up to $20,000 for the adoption of a child.

An estimated 2,354 Salvadoran children were adopted into the U.S. during the war. Asociación Pro-Búsqueda is trying to track these children down and re-connect them with their birth families. It is difficult work.

The organization’s San Salvador offices were violently attacked by gunmen in 2013, ruining an estimated 80% of the documents they had gathered in efforts to reunite families. The government has refused to provide access to records that might help families find their lost children.

Throughout the civil war, thousands of children were forcibly separated from their families; approximately 2,354 children were adopted into the U.S., with adopted parents told that they were orphans. (Photo by Linda Hess Miller via Wikimedia Commons)
Throughout the civil war, thousands of children were forcibly separated from their families; approximately 2,354 children were adopted into the U.S., with adopted parents told that they were orphans. (Photo by Linda Hess Miller via Wikimedia Commons)

Despite these challenges, the organization has successfully reunited over 200 now adult children with their birth families. Hundreds of cases remain unsolved.

“The only thing that [the families] want is to meet them and be sure that the young person knows that they have family in El Salvador that are looking for them,” says Margarita Zamora Tobar, the coordinator of Pro-Búsqueda’s research unit.

The State Department has issued a travel warning for El Salvador, but I always felt safe. We swerved down dirt roads as the summer heat sweltered down from above. We waved at locals who greeted the gringos with a curious look and a “buenas,” and sang, “Dale Salvadoreño ¡Dale!” [Let’s go Salvadorans! Let’s go!] as soon as we learned the popular tune.

At survivors’ homes, we were always welcomed with open arms and plenty of delicious homemade tortillas, rice, and meat. Despite my limited Spanish abilities, a particular word always stood out: “esperanza” [hope].

One of the survivors we interviewed wore a radiant turquoise blue skirt that complimented the lime green walls of her home. As the interview began, I initially felt safe. I was at a distance, protected by both the language barrier and the video camera.

And then, she brought out a photo. Her nine-year-old brother smiling proudly into the camera, hair parted smoothly through the middle. That aged black-and-white photo is all she has left of him; all that remains after the army took him away.

I saw her struggle: the look in her eyes, the tears down her cheek, the slight trembling of her hands as she recalled a much darker time and the initial distance between us crumbled.

During other testimonies, survivors described how they survived rape, torture, massacres. How they saw the army throw their children out of helicopters while others were forcibly taken away. How their homes were burned down, spouses killed, the barrel of the gun directed at them point blank.

They fled for their lives, lost their families, survived, and life just went on.

Task force students, including the author pictured in the purple hat, take a ride in the back of a pick-up truck while traveling through the countryside. (Photo Courtesy of Unfinished Sentences)
Task force students, including the author (front left), take a ride in the back of a pick-up truck while traveling through the countryside. (Photo Courtesy of Unfinished Sentences)

Many Salvadorans fled the country altogether. Some ended up here in the northwest, where several parishes participated in the sanctuary movement, offering shelter to refugees fleeing conflicts in Central America.

The University Baptist Church joined the movement in 1982 as the first publicly declared sanctuary in the Northwest. Throughout the war, the church housed around 50 Salvadoran and Guatemalan refugees.

“They were in fear of their lives and to give them a better life was something we could play a part in,” says Margie Paynton, the church’s Minister of Music. “They wanted to tell their story, we wanted to listen.

On my last day in San Salvador, we visited the Monumento a la Memoria y la Verdad [Monument to Memory and Truth], a sprawling black granite memorial in Cuscatlan Park that lists only a quarter of the names of the thousands of men, women, and children killed or disappeared during the war.

The park is peaceful, illuminated by lush green trees as couples enjoy a picnic on the grass and children play with their toys. Yet, within it all stands the memorial, a solemn reminder of a past history shrouded by destruction and horror.

The Monument of Memory and Truth in San Salvador commemorates only a fraction of the 75,000 men, women, and children killed during the civil war that ravaged the country from 1980 until 1992. (Photo by Nicole Einbinder)
The Monument of Memory and Truth in San Salvador commemorates only a fraction of the 75,000 men, women, and children killed during the civil war that ravaged the country from 1980 until 1992. (Photo by Nicole Einbinder)

The memorial has so many names: Elias and Rutilio and Miguel and Jose and Edith and Blanca and Ester. An endless list of people who all had stories, who all had ears and eyes and hopes and dreams. They all deserved life and yet it was taken from them by their own army, their own people. Their stories were cut short and now all that remains are the names, so many names.

It is impossible to fully describe my experience in El Salvador. On one hand, it was terrible: we heard testimonies that I still can’t comprehend; stories of the terrible hate and ignorance that people can inflict on other human beings. But we also played soccer with children on a makeshift dirt field, laughed and swapped stories with survivors, felt the wind in our faces while zooming through the countryside in the back of a pick-up truck. We heard stories radiating hope and strength amidst unthinkable evilWe witnessed the worst and best of humanity.

Get involved

If you believe you or someone you know was illegally adopted from El Salvador, contact Asociación Pro-Búsqueda.

19 Comments

  1. Beautifully written, thank you!

    With peace and love, and "esperanza",
    Kim in Maine

  2. muy amable gracias thanks for the story,
    been there since mid 80's moved there in 94

    I go to that wall sometimes and can only after a prayer cry,
    thanks for keeping this going,
    revenge is best served cold
    Viva 'El Frente Verde'

  3. Thank you for writing this story, what an amazing article you wrote. Reading your experience, strength and hope I thought she actually captured what these families were hanging onto hope. May this article reach millions of human hearts and may God restore these families!

  4. Your story is amazing! I am a disappeared child from El Salvador, but still have not reunited with any living family. Your story strengthens my desire to go!

    1. My husband was also one of those children adopted out in 1983 how or who do i contact to try and trace any family do you know?

  5. Hmm itt looks like your site ate my first comment (it was extremely long) so I guess I’ll just sum
    it up whqt I submitted and say, I’m thoroughly enjoying your blog.
    I as well amm an aspiring blog writer but I’m still new
    to the whole thing. Do you have any suggestions for rookie blog writers?
    I’d definitely appreciate it.

  6. Hello, I am looking for Franklin Amilcar Landaverde; nose que fue de el desde 1987; se que temia por su vida, en ese tiempo el tenia 18 anos y era estudiante. Would you help me find him?

  7. I have a brother 2 years younger than me, we were separate withing the war and the desperation of the poverty. This is betwing 1980 and 1983. I am desperate my mother is diyng and i would like he knows his real mother. Not for economic help but, my mother could rest in peace. His name should be Erick Gonzalez , unless his las name had change do to the adoption.

  8. Hi my husband is one of those children that was adopted in 83 from El Salvador . Where do we start in order to find his family ?

  9. I liked your story…I am also adopted from El Salvador….came to the US when I was 2 in 1983…I am hopeful that I too will be able to find family in EL Salvador one day… unfortunately I probably won’t since I don’t know my birth name or date of birth…my adopted mother was told I was found on the street then taken to an orphanage

  10. My mother in law lost her oldest son in the war and still cries about him til this day and would like help searching for him. Please email me at

    Pgomez1211@yahoo.com

    Thank you!

  11. Hi my name is Rosa, I was also adopted into the USA around 1980-1983..All my life I have always wanted to meet my real mother, I still feel like my adopted parents are hiding things from me..I was wondering if y’all could help me😢

  12. I am Claudia Garcia now Lewis, adopted in 1989 and living in UK from EL Salvador. Never been able to find any information on my mother. I was told she couldn’t look after me as she was only 16/17

  13. I was adopted in 1980 at 6 months old, born with Spina Bifida. I was flown on a plane to Miami with other children from an orphanage. My birth name was Esmeralda Contrasti and I am now Amanda Regan.

    1. I was adopted from El Salvador in 1976. My birth mom used an X to sign her name. I would like to find her but I have no idea how to go about it. I currently live in Ohio. If anyone can help me with this process please reach out. I’m 42 now. And very happy with my life but I would love to know about my real mom.

  14. Hey, I was born 1990 in El Salvador in the city San Salvador . Im also adopted and live in Belgium. My adoption mother is for me my real mother. They told my mother(adoption) that my biological mother left me in hospital. She was young and desperate. It’s sad to hear that some biological mothers lost their babies. Good luck

  15. Twin boys adopted in 1980. My adoptive brothers. They were only 2 months old. Even when I was a child my parents told of how quick and easy the adoption went through. Birth mother couldn’t care for them, was illiterate, used an x to sign her name. Sounds very familiar. I believe they have a family in El Salvador who wanted them.

Comments are closed.

19 Comments

  1. Beautifully written, thank you!

    With peace and love, and "esperanza",
    Kim in Maine

  2. muy amable gracias thanks for the story,
    been there since mid 80's moved there in 94

    I go to that wall sometimes and can only after a prayer cry,
    thanks for keeping this going,
    revenge is best served cold
    Viva 'El Frente Verde'

  3. Thank you for writing this story, what an amazing article you wrote. Reading your experience, strength and hope I thought she actually captured what these families were hanging onto hope. May this article reach millions of human hearts and may God restore these families!

  4. Your story is amazing! I am a disappeared child from El Salvador, but still have not reunited with any living family. Your story strengthens my desire to go!

    1. My husband was also one of those children adopted out in 1983 how or who do i contact to try and trace any family do you know?

  5. Hmm itt looks like your site ate my first comment (it was extremely long) so I guess I’ll just sum
    it up whqt I submitted and say, I’m thoroughly enjoying your blog.
    I as well amm an aspiring blog writer but I’m still new
    to the whole thing. Do you have any suggestions for rookie blog writers?
    I’d definitely appreciate it.

  6. Hello, I am looking for Franklin Amilcar Landaverde; nose que fue de el desde 1987; se que temia por su vida, en ese tiempo el tenia 18 anos y era estudiante. Would you help me find him?

  7. I have a brother 2 years younger than me, we were separate withing the war and the desperation of the poverty. This is betwing 1980 and 1983. I am desperate my mother is diyng and i would like he knows his real mother. Not for economic help but, my mother could rest in peace. His name should be Erick Gonzalez , unless his las name had change do to the adoption.

  8. Hi my husband is one of those children that was adopted in 83 from El Salvador . Where do we start in order to find his family ?

  9. I liked your story…I am also adopted from El Salvador….came to the US when I was 2 in 1983…I am hopeful that I too will be able to find family in EL Salvador one day… unfortunately I probably won’t since I don’t know my birth name or date of birth…my adopted mother was told I was found on the street then taken to an orphanage

  10. My mother in law lost her oldest son in the war and still cries about him til this day and would like help searching for him. Please email me at

    Pgomez1211@yahoo.com

    Thank you!

  11. Hi my name is Rosa, I was also adopted into the USA around 1980-1983..All my life I have always wanted to meet my real mother, I still feel like my adopted parents are hiding things from me..I was wondering if y’all could help me😢

  12. I am Claudia Garcia now Lewis, adopted in 1989 and living in UK from EL Salvador. Never been able to find any information on my mother. I was told she couldn’t look after me as she was only 16/17

  13. I was adopted in 1980 at 6 months old, born with Spina Bifida. I was flown on a plane to Miami with other children from an orphanage. My birth name was Esmeralda Contrasti and I am now Amanda Regan.

    1. I was adopted from El Salvador in 1976. My birth mom used an X to sign her name. I would like to find her but I have no idea how to go about it. I currently live in Ohio. If anyone can help me with this process please reach out. I’m 42 now. And very happy with my life but I would love to know about my real mom.

  14. Hey, I was born 1990 in El Salvador in the city San Salvador . Im also adopted and live in Belgium. My adoption mother is for me my real mother. They told my mother(adoption) that my biological mother left me in hospital. She was young and desperate. It’s sad to hear that some biological mothers lost their babies. Good luck

  15. Twin boys adopted in 1980. My adoptive brothers. They were only 2 months old. Even when I was a child my parents told of how quick and easy the adoption went through. Birth mother couldn’t care for them, was illiterate, used an x to sign her name. Sounds very familiar. I believe they have a family in El Salvador who wanted them.

Comments are closed.